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Photo by Kristine Lundblad |
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 erby, who has NEVER been sick a day in her life, got very sick just before we
left for the WEG 2010 in Lexington, KY. After a lot of diagnostics, they discovered internal bleeding. When they operated on her they found that her
spleen had ruptured. Apparently something that is not that abnormal in dogs. They take it out and the dogs are fine. The cause of the
rupture was a tumor that we later discovered was malignant. After taking the spleen out, they did a little exploratory and determined there were no more tumors
and believed she would be just fine. The veterinarian believes, now, that during her spleen surgery, the tumors on her liver that led to her demise were too
small to be seen.
Derby did recover from her splenectomy and was the happiest dog alive her last month. She had more energy than I have seen her have in years and galloped
everywhere she went. She even went to Regionals with us and attended every awards ceremony and proudly barked her head off for each and every one receiving awards.
My amazing, perfect, little house is not nearly as amazing or perfect without Derby's little feet walking around in it. To say my heart is shattered into a million
pieces would be an understatement. I don't remember my life without Derby in it and almost every picture I have is a reminder of that. If she is not the
center of every picture, it seems like she managed to work her way into at least the background of almost every one.
I kept trying to convince myself to get a grip at first by telling myself she was just a dog but, the truth is, she was so much more than just a dog. I wouldn't even
say Derby was a well trained dog. Actually, she wasn't really trained at all. She did exactly what she pleased her whole life, but, it just so happened
that what pleased her also pleased me, so it worked out quite well. She came when I called her, if she felt like it. She stayed when I told her to, if she
didn't have anything better to do and she never really did sit or lay down on command. If you had food, you could bribe her to do a few crazy things, but only if she
was in the mood. But, with all of that she was the perfect dog. I never had to keep an eye on her because she kept her eye on me. She and I had
these silent circles that we both worked in that no matter where I was, I could look up and make eye contact with her. And now, as I sit here on my couch, alone, I
realize that I talked to her more than I talk to most of my house guests.
I'll never stop missing her, that is for sure. I will have another dog. I am thinking sooner rather than later, as I have discovered I cannot stand my
house without a dog, but it will not be to replace her. Nothing will ever replace my first experience with unconditional love and friendship.
If there was ever a need for a reminder that I am surrounded by unconditional love in my life, I have been reminded over and over again this week. Through Facebook and
word of mouth, I know several of you have already heard about my little Derbs and I THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart for all of your calls, texts, emails, cards,
flowers, edible arrangements, cookies and BEER. Each and every one has helped soften the blow little by little, but honestly, it is the heartfelt and sincere
hugs that help the most.
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| Photo by Kristine Lundblad |
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I wish someone had given Jesus a dog.
As loyal and loving as mine.
To sleep by His manger and gaze in His eyes
And adore Him for being divine.
As our Lord grew to manhood His faithful dog,
Would have followed Him all through the day.
While He preached to the crowds and made the sick well
And knelt in the garden to pray.
It is sad to remember that Christ went away.
To face death alone and apart.
With no tender dog following close behind,
To comfort its Master's Heart.
And when Jesus rose on that Easter morn,
How happy He would have been,
As His dog kissed His hand and barked it's delight,
For The One who died for all men.
Well, the Lord has a dog now, I just sent Him mine,
The old pal so dear to me.
And I smile through my tears on this first day alone,
Knowing they're in eternity.
Day after day, the whole day through,
Wherever my road inclined,
Four feet said, "Wait, I'm coming with you!"
And trotted along behind.
Rudyard Kipling
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